ICYMI

 

Image result for facepalm

 

Last week I posted individual sentences from books read over the summer. Now I’m going to share with you the one I’ve thought about the most. It’s from Wilderness at Dawn: The Settling of the North American Continent, by Ted Morgan:

Both were shot, and Captain Gregg played dead while an Indian removed his scalp, leaving a bad cut on his forehead.

 

Forget Captain Gregg: did Captain Obvious write that sentence? I’ve been trying to come up with an equivalent, and it’s provided some amusement:

The arsonist burned down the house, leaving ashes on the ground.

The barroom erupted in a brawl, leaving drinks spilled on tables.

The reserve chute failed to deploy, leaving the skydiver’s rate of descent accelerated.

 

Here, you try it!

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PS Reading the book I realized I’d read, years before, the author’s memoir My Battle of Algiers, about his wartime service as a French conscript. If I recall correctly, at his army induction the intake officer, upon learning Morgan had a university education, stamped his file “Illiterate.” [I bet ol’ Ted said touché, eh, Jeff? – ed.]